What can single parents find within the church? In this episode of Single Christian Women Speak podcast you will discover encouragement as Debbie shares her experience of a young couple who stepped up within the church, forging meaningful relationships with her, her sister, and her single mother. She elaborates, “A core group of couples that just hovered over us.” Debbie provides real-life examples of single-parent families and singles, in general, finding their place within the church, stating, “The church I am involved in right now has a very open door.”
Traditionally, the church has been seen as a space for married couples. Still, Debbie observes, “There are a lot more singles in our churches than ever before,” and encourages, “Just because you don’t have a spouse doesn’t mean you don’t have something to contribute.”
Debbie declares, “It can be a very lonely life,” referring to single parenting. She shares her experiences of joining small groups alone, as a married woman, but feeling disconnected, advising, “Go find one that you haven’t been in before.”
The church offers numerous resources for single parents, such as homework help, small groups, camaraderie, and formal and informal mentoring, some of which she explores from her experiences.
Shifting gears, Debbie addresses widowhood, noting, “Sometimes single parents aren’t single because of divorce. They can be single because of death,” discussing it through the lens of grief. She highlights that “Widowhood has incredible stages of grief,” sharing a relatable example that leads into discussions about blended families.
Does grief look the same in every situation, moment, and person’s life? Listen as Debbie answers, “no.” She addresses questions like, “How does a single woman identify when she is grieving?” Also, indicating how some women, "struggle to be a single.” She mentions experiences such as job loss and broken engagements, recalling that in Grief Share, she learned that “Grief is like waves of an ocean.” She explains, “Ride it,” then elaborates on the feelings that arise as the emotions crest, encouraging us not to fear our feelings.
What should a single do when struggling to find their place in the church? Debbie advises, “Single’s, if you are in a church setting where you just can’t find where you fit in, look for another church family. There is a family out there for you,” and adds, “Pray. He’ll put you where you need to be.”
"God sets the lonely in families." (Psalms 68:6)
Listen to Part 2 of Debbie’s encouraging story. You can begin with Part 1 here. Her story spans many years and covers her journey through being a child of a single parent, her family finding a place within the church, and navigating grief in widowhood and singleness.
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Reference List: New International Version (2020). The NIV Study Bible. Zondervan.
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